Hermit

32,546,700

September 2026 points

Scores updated 8 min ago

Tweets: 266
Likes: 290,040
Retweets: 10,325
Replies: 918
Quote tweets: 599
2× boosted: 1
Followers: 467+136

Every scored tweet

300 per tweet · 100 per like · 200 per reply · 300 per retweet · 300 per quote tweet

Tweet	Likes	Retweets	Replies	Quotes	Boost	Points
for my 18th birthday my girlfriend (who was a few months younger than me) invited me over to her place "while her parents were gone" 😏 when I arrived she left the room and my best friend walked in dressed as Chris Hansen and said "What did you think was going to happen here?" https://t.co/RJRSFSmAGe Aug 6🥇 Gold	117,196	3,898	223	146	—	12,977,700
omg im so embarrassed,,, the abyss was actually gazing at its friend right behind me 😬😬😭 Aug 24🥇 Gold	26,231	2,780	20	39	—	3,473,100
every chair is a cuck chair when you're not having sex Aug 12🥇 Gold	19,975	775	15	24	—	2,240,500
easily one of my favorite birthdays Aug 6🥇 Gold	22,056	77	24	1	—	2,234,100
BESTIE: ooooh third date tonight, you know what that means ME: (nodding) failing the penultimate layer of the survivability onion BESTIE: ME: fourth date he kills me https://t.co/ADPPtFiwVl Aug 26🥇 Gold	18,025	910	30	33	—	2,091,700
when I ran out of the house to escape, all my other friends were there, waiting to arrest me with zip ties and shoot me with nerf darts then they perp-walked me to get cake Aug 6🥇 Gold	19,456	80	4	2	—	1,971,300
he read excerpts from a fabricated chat log, claiming I sent messages "so obscene that they had to bleep them in the written transcript" Aug 6🥇 Gold	17,539	59	1	0	—	1,772,100
I put LotR on in Italian to see if Gandalf refers to the Balrog with the formal or informal "you" in YOU SHALL NOT PASS it's the informal, which raises a second question: is it because he doesn't respect the Balrog or because they boyz (both maiar) Aug 6🥇 Gold	13,158	619	135	71	—	1,550,100
it's common advice to dumb down your vocabulary to reach a wider audience. I wanna know who's elevating it to cut more people out. who's using words that were only written down once in the 1400s and once in the dictionary. who's writing at a 75th-grade reading level Aug 16🥈 Silver	5,304	331	214	170	—	723,800
the mark of a good streaming service is an iconic show/movie that you can't get anywhere else netflix: kpop demon hunters hbo: succession united states library of congress: Silent Footage of Liza Minnelli's Third Birthday Party as Filmed by Famed American Lyricist Ira Gershwin https://t.co/ARhr9FLymY Aug 6🥈 Silver	5,181	389	7	5	—	638,000
@itsyaboidougie one of the funniest things I've been a part of and I had nothing to do with it Aug 7🥉 Bronze	4,845	4	4	0	—	486,800
@NathanImago gdi you're right. they shouldn't have used nerf guns Aug 7🥉 Bronze	4,242	3	3	0	—	426,000
I can't date someone with a creative passion unless I legitimately like/respect what they make. I was insane to ever think it could be otherwise Aug 19🥉 Bronze	3,345	135	13	84	—	403,100
@Flydie_Lwood oh, he'd been practicing Aug 7🥉 Bronze	3,646	3	0	0	—	365,800
we should bring back cutely ironic punishments that echo the nature of the wrongdoer's crime for example, whoever replaced the twitter photo grid with the carousel could be drawn and quartered Aug 18🥉 Bronze	3,182	151	9	0	—	365,600
walking by a math department and lobbing a golden apple that says: ✨"Round to the nearest integer: 0.49999999..."✨ Aug 11🥉 Bronze	2,113	22	26	7	—	225,500
imagine inventing a word that means "good judgment; restraint", and then the first time someone asks you to spell it you have a full-blown panic attack that gets recorded in every dictionary for the rest of time https://t.co/SmVzlcZuFq Aug 29	852	35	5	1	—	97,300
@ascetic_shadow I actually reconnected with a lot of them recently after drifting apart post high school; I should ask them if they remember anything else about it the next time we hang out Aug 6	560	0	3	0	—	56,900
A friend recently told me he thinks people shouldn't be allowed to read whatever they want; that we should be socially policing thoughtcrime. I find myself growing less and less capable of having conversations like this Aug 21	202	6	11	4	—	25,700
I've tried faking it, being honest, loving it because they made it, avoiding the subject entirely. The only thing that's ever worked is actually thinking "holy shit my gf is so talented 🤩😍🥰🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵" Aug 19	218	0	1	1	—	22,600
@wirmgurl I'm willing to pick an undergraduate math department at a D-tier theater school to make this work Aug 11	208	1	1	0	—	21,600
@Poopiepoopapoo i had already raised my hand in a little half-wave so i tried to play it off like i was just reaching to adjust my glasses, but im wearing contacts so i just kind of pawed at my face Aug 24	170	1	1	0	—	17,800
Here's the best advice I know with absolute certainty: Record your parents retelling your family stories. Save the files in multiple locations. By the time you fully appreciate how good this advice is, it will be too late Aug 21	138	8	4	0	—	17,300
the only real sexualities are good pervert, bad pervert, and antihero pervert Aug 18	107	11	3	1	—	15,200
@adam__isom @noa_tate_ Zeno's paradox is getting infinitesimally close to entering the chat Aug 11	103	0	0	0	—	10,600
I almost wasn't going to buy this $17,000 diamond ring from the online goodwill store, but then I saw that it had the green 1¢ shipping sticker I'd be a fool to let a deal like that pass me by https://t.co/zwKXlfFyrt Aug 18	81	0	2	0	—	8,800
Why are there only ever 1-2 mosquitoes in my room? If I kill one, another will find its way in. But if I don't kill one for days, it never goes above 1-2 mosquitoes. Why don't the replacement mosquitoes come in if the originals are still alive? Why don't I end up with 20? Aug 23	69	0	6	0	—	8,400
@DaSpudLord you've ±passed the test Aug 11	78	0	0	0	—	8,100
@moldbugchaser and so the fight in the math department begins Aug 11	65	0	1	0	—	7,000
@thereisnome369 lmao yeah Aug 6	62	0	0	0	—	6,500
@Slippyzipp6388 Ah, but I have long been prepared for your periphrastic canticles: https://t.co/cU33Frmv5I Aug 16	57	0	1	0	—	6,200
@ianhowlett depends on your purpose in using a given word. you can't always get the same effect from the simplest one available https://t.co/Uhjdiq0vi9 Aug 16	55	1	0	0	—	6,100
I must be the only mf dumb enough to regularly write 20k words to figure something out and then publish none of them because "it seems too obvious to share" Aug 14	52	0	3	0	—	6,100
thinking about putting 20 hours of work into a dumb tweet that'll get 4 likes Aug 18	37	2	5	1	—	5,900
And lo, unto them came the cowboy god, Yeehaweh, Aug 6	44	4	0	0	—	5,900
https://t.co/44SMdcckAi Aug 6	44	1	0	0	—	5,000
when I said I'd reward you handsomely, I meant I'd look hot doing it. here's 5 bucks uggo Aug 25	34	3	0	0	—	4,600
that which can be destroyed by this cool hammer I found should be Aug 28	28	4	0	0	—	4,300
@wirmgurl have you tried applyall? I personally have no experience with it, but I've been showing it to people in my life who are looking for jobs and they seem to like it @AnthonyCastrio not sure if you prefer to not be tagged in posts like these, but worm girl, the link is in his bio Aug 19	10	2	1	0	2× ApplyAll	4,200 2,100 × 2
@tnickbyrnes4 see, you can understand why i was confused Aug 24	36	0	1	0	—	4,100
is it weird that I feel less masculine for never having had the dynamite headache https://t.co/xOayTiAWlT Aug 11	18	1	4	1	—	3,500
@ThinkBaseLLC I hope one of the languages is ancient akkadian Aug 16	29	0	1	0	—	3,400
@AestheticRadius a combination of sign language and semaphore that looks to an untrained eye like me sprinting away, my robes billowing behind me Aug 7	28	1	0	0	—	3,400
@ichbinilya huh, I've never thought about it, but I guess "...hallowed be _thy_ name... for _thine_ is the kingdom, etc" tracks with that, informal thou even though it sounds elevated to modern ears Aug 7	29	0	1	0	—	3,400
Why has twitter put so much effort into hiding the fact that a tweet is part of a thread? Genuinely what was wrong with the old "show this thread" button? Aug 27	24	0	3	0	—	3,300
New research suggests Ozymandias, King of Kings was actually just a massive foot fetishist Aug 12	22	1	1	1	—	3,300
did you know? "don't cast your pearls before swine" isn't advice about not wasting your pearls, it's advice about not getting assassinated by pigs https://t.co/SnN9RAZAdA Aug 27	18	3	1	0	—	3,200
kinda hard to be normal about dating when your family history is filled with aspirational expressions of love like this https://t.co/pMYcTyf8MV Aug 23	27	0	1	0	—	3,200
💯TODAY💯 🦊I GOT🦊 🐥TO TELL SOMEONE🐥 🍀THAT DUE TO🍀 💎A CHROMOSOMAL💎 🧿ABNORMALITY🧿 🔮HEEEEEEE'S🔮 🌈COLORBLIND🌈 Aug 15	23	0	1	1	—	3,100
I love flirting, but hate flirting in front of other people. Feels like a psychopathically brazen social power game when there's an audience Aug 30	25	0	1	0	—	3,000
@WilliamBlickos "lamentation", "lamentably"...? my parvenu criticaster, if you must cavil about my dearth of recherché excrescence via psittacistic rodomontade, pray avoid a catachrestic roundelay whose valetudinarian ostinato scarce graces dis legomenon ere its amaranthine thew deliquesces Aug 17	20	0	2	1	—	3,000
grok, it's very important that you heavenban me (twitter dot com user @hermitfriend) back to the moots-only algorithm. I'm exempted from this accursed A/B test by diplomatic immunity, divine right of kings, and a signed note from my mom Aug 14	24	0	1	0	—	2,900
@PurdToaster we make the horses carousel horses Aug 19	20	0	0	1	—	2,600
lmao been getting a number of women sliding into my dms for my silly jokes 😎 so fine, I guess I'll finally hop on the trend and write a date me doc. link in next tweet Aug 30	18	0	2	0	—	2,500
@DonnieDorko4 @wirmgurl 🫡 thank you, you've earned yourself an executive producer's credit on the apple Aug 11	22	0	0	0	—	2,500
@Supamalaman None beyond whatever minimal social pressure he can exert Aug 21	19	0	1	0	—	2,400
@aflicker I just picked up Shadow of the Torturer a few weeks ago! I'll look forward to it even more now Aug 16	16	1	1	0	—	2,400
@Deathmurlok true, but probably bad taste to bring it up during the post-apocalypse Aug 13	21	0	0	0	—	2,400
helped my friend move a storage unit's worth of solid wood and metal furniture yesterday. goodbye joie de vivre of a starry-eyed youth, hello back pain of a 300-year-old ghoul Aug 5	21	0	0	0	—	2,400
@Current93VEVO we must reytournne teo tradyscchion Aug 29	20	0	0	0	—	2,300
...................oh https://t.co/SuIKM7Jg4U Aug 18	20	0	0	0	—	2,300
How to judge your tweets with zero likes: 10,000 views: "The stupid algorithm is showing this to the wrong people" 100 views: "Hmm, I guess I could've phrased that better" 1 view, 6 seconds after you posted it: "Everyone hates me and I will die alone" Aug 14	15	1	1	0	—	2,300
you don't get to call yourself a <noun> if you don't <verb> writers write, musicians play, artists draw, athletes train, friends make time, lovers [redacted] [redacted] [holy shit REDACTED] Aug 25	19	0	0	0	—	2,200
I'm friends with a married couple who always say it would be a bad idea for them to have kids, and it's basically the only thing about them that makes me think they might be right Aug 14	17	0	1	0	—	2,200
@pav_light Same. At least when there's a baseline level of appreciation I can find some aspect to earnestly praise. But when it's antithetical to what I think makes good work... 😬 Luckily I'm blessed with talented friends whose work I largely enjoy (and when I don't I feel I can say so) Aug 19	16	0	1	0	—	2,100
https://t.co/AZHboi0OeL Aug 19	18	0	0	0	—	2,100
people with sleep paralysis demons are so lucky. my paralysis demon snorts that shit that kept the nazis awake Aug 16	14	0	2	0	—	2,100
gwern announcement https://t.co/Ok0zBhu4cJ Aug 5	16	0	1	0	—	2,100
proud to announce I finally have "fuck you" money: https://t.co/GI92xaPPFB Aug 28	15	0	1	0	—	2,000
One of my friends recently tried to correct my unforgivably backward view of "caring whether my future kids are biologically mine or not" A perfect time to remember that every now and again you have to tell even your closest friends to fuck off Aug 31	14	0	1	0	—	1,900
just found this little guy dancing on my shirt after I'd been inside for over an hour. please give him a name to get emotionally attached to him, then say goodbye so I can return him to his natural habitat https://t.co/dm6bYe5whq Aug 28	14	0	1	0	—	1,900
profile name idea for an egirl: Charli SSX Tricky Aug 17	8	0	4	0	—	1,900
@Rusty_Swarf "but doctor..." Aug 29	15	0	0	0	—	1,800
@Sandwich_Smith No, it's mostly about quality. Though content can be both a moral error and a sign of low quality (e.g. overt didacticism; message pictures) Being an amateur who's learning is straightforwardly good, wildly overestimating the quality of what you've made is not Aug 19	13	0	1	0	—	1,800
you have no idea what a big deal this is for me. the depths I've delved on color theory. the time I've spent. this is my Christmas morning I understand he may not see it that way, given Christmas's red-green color scheme Aug 15	11	0	2	0	—	1,800
time to do something either incredibly stupid or incredibly wise Aug 10	10	1	1	0	—	1,800
If you're ever wondering how I'm feeling, instead of going to the trouble of asking me you can just reread this tweet https://t.co/o1t3Cuk6gE Aug 30	12	0	1	0	—	1,700
Men will call women irrational for wanting validation rather than solutions, then feel seen for the first time when Theoden cries "DEATH! DEATH! DEEEEEEATH!" at the Pelennor Fields Aug 29	14	0	0	0	—	1,700
TWINK CORONER: according to the autopsy, he'd started bodybuilding. and looksmaxxing. bonesmashing, lifting heavy, tren, you name it-- GF INTO WAIFISH BOYS: omg no, don't tell me this TWINK CORONER: I'm afraid... it was a twink suicide Aug 27	12	0	1	0	—	1,700
I'm saving my least trad opinions for marriage Aug 27	11	0	0	1	—	1,700
@LukRamsay the soul of a poet, in the body of a hot poet... yeah ok I can see the appeal but what would you say to them when you read their poetry? Aug 19	9	0	1	1	—	1,700
the super bassy dance music at this party is knocking at a door of my heart that I know not how to open Aug 15	14	0	0	0	—	1,700
[me, eating lethally poisoned surf and turf]: 😭🦞🥩 [guy at the next table watching me]: my lobster too buttery, my steak too juicy Aug 13	14	0	0	0	—	1,700
@well_hello_you_ just another day at the office for a couple of ainur like us Aug 7	14	0	0	0	—	1,700
@moldbugchaser Yeah, the simplest proof is 0.333... = 1/3 multiply both sides by 3, 0.999... = 3/3 0.999... = 1 Aug 11	9	0	2	0	—	1,600
all i'm saying is if i were at mount doom the day the strength of men failed it wouldn't have gone down like that Aug 11	13	0	0	0	—	1,600
Same guy btw https://t.co/FwmReUXZcl Aug 31	10	0	1	0	—	1,500
my great-grandfather crashed his future wife's previous wedding on horseback and said "You don't want to marry him." she said "You're right." and got on the horse Aug 23	10	0	1	0	—	1,500
lemme get this straight. you're harboring two wolves on a residential property, intentionally starving one of them, and placing bets on the other to win a premeditated fight to the death? buddy, you're going to jail Aug 31	11	0	0	0	—	1,400
ladies 😏 https://t.co/JahJpYaFnQ Aug 30	9	0	1	0	—	1,400
Lowest Common Denominator Soundsystem would be such a good burn if I didn't like LCD Soundsystem Aug 28	9	0	1	0	—	1,400
Are they just stopping in to drink my blood and leaving, and what I actually have is a very efficient drive-thru window? Aug 23	11	0	0	0	—	1,400
Could be a "we will not mess you up like our parents messed us up" thing, only instead of confronting the problem head on and potentially making mistakes they win by not playing https://t.co/QwLa02fw24 Aug 14	7	0	2	0	—	1,400
hey neat it's my pfp 🧙‍♂️ [CHIRPBIRDICON] 🫴 Aug 17	10	0	0	0	—	1,300
@midnucas lmao I love that though, isn't he very high-ranking by hobbit standards? maybe not in the way it would be understood in Gondor, but he had some inherited title/claim to become local ruler, didn't he? or am I mixing that up Aug 7	8	0	1	0	—	1,300
RELAX, I can explain ...in the sense that I can describe what's happening, not that I can defend my actions Aug 31	6	0	0	1	—	1,200
@cosine_distance it didn't fully hit me until I went back and looked at old tweets where I chose the photos at least somewhat intentionally for the grid e.g. when I was doing little writeups of silent films I had them start with an intertitle paired with a relevant shot https://t.co/fHInYBzjY0 Aug 19	9	0	0	0	—	1,200
@venividinotavi thought it might be a synonym for quiddity, but luckily there's a section of the wiki article devoted to curing that exact misunderstanding. thank goodness I won't look like a FOOL the next time I talk about the irreducible elements of being https://t.co/YlLoQVyREr Aug 11	4	0	1	1	—	1,200
@anaphandao adorable. hope you have enough shelf space for the future Tony awards Aug 7	9	0	0	0	—	1,200
@_Sp1tFir3 had to update it to speak to the younger generation. kids these days don't know about their Wires and Bands of Brothers and Sopranoses Aug 7	7	0	1	0	—	1,200
I do this as well and it's insane that the """""correct,",",","," version was ever implemented https://t.co/5nVtSqsWY8 Aug 1	7	0	1	0	—	1,200
Same guy here too https://t.co/MYjginnN6G Aug 31	6	0	1	0	—	1,100
@Jxspxrth ah, yes of course, I get what you're saying. say no more, wink wink nudge nudge Aug 16	8	0	0	0	—	1,100
@LeProjetSerret a book that comes with a built-in reason to read The Faerie Queene? sounds great already Aug 16	6	0	1	0	—	1,100
@ByrgaGeniht alas, as that sounds like it could be right up my alley Aug 16	6	0	1	0	—	1,100
I don't understand what makes them feel that way. I've seen them both interact with kids a fair amount; they both seem to like them a lot I wonder if it's some cultural pressure that I'm removed enough from to not understand Aug 14	6	0	1	0	—	1,100
the Merriam-Webster time traveler is so useful for understanding how culture develops apparently in 1725 they invented blue decks, leaving a burning building, winging it, murder, breathing, Hitchcock bootlegs, the .38 Detective Special, Wonderland, and not cutting your balls off https://t.co/LzPy9nO6Qp Aug 1	6	0	1	0	—	1,100
@galaxymagnet Might be easier to list the things that aren't thoughtcrime Aug 22	5	0	1	0	—	1,000
@MysteryHacker1 oh, I am IN. if only it weren't $400 https://t.co/ekK2NGfGXV Aug 16	5	0	1	0	—	1,000
such a brazen act of hubris when an app sends me a cloying nudge notification like I won't kick their entire codebase into the sun on a first transgression Aug 1	7	0	0	0	—	1,000
@bridgietherease hmmm, like discreet and accretion, I can see it Aug 29	4	0	1	0	—	900
Of all the changes to this site, many of which have been quite positive, this and the perpetually broken search are the most baffling and terrible Aug 27	4	0	1	0	—	900
@silverarm0r the game devs are denying me my right to be swarmed by tiny vampires Aug 24	4	0	1	0	—	900
tag yourself Aug 18	3	1	0	0	—	900
I wish I had better insight into their thoughts. I've talked to them about it a lot, and it seems like they just think it's a given that it would be bad, but only have a nebulous ideas as to why might be Aug 15	2	0	2	0	—	900
@yyallian dream app. but if a transatlantic is only 22 hours, I might need slower pigeons for my local friends Aug 13	4	0	1	0	—	900
@yyallian recently read a love letter my grandma wrote to my grandad when they were first dating what I learned is you gotta be completely in love first 🤷‍♂️ Aug 11	6	0	0	0	—	900
Mary Oliver, getting a little nosy about your Baskin Robbins order: Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild 'n reckless sherbet! Aug 28	3	0	1	0	—	800
feel like shit just want her back https://t.co/MGJ8xcllyf Aug 27	5	0	0	0	—	800
we're considering a minimalist bohemian aesthetic for the living room. sort of a tohu wa-boho chic Aug 25	5	0	0	0	—	800
@silverarm0r Originally that he didn't want people to engage with political philosophies that he disagreed with, because they might be convinced. Upon prodding it expanded to things like old literature with contemporary cultural/moral views, books by bad people, and smut Aug 22	3	0	1	0	—	800
@funplings I still don't know what it is and I refuse to learn https://t.co/na8DZy894A Aug 21	5	0	0	0	—	800
@Sandwich_Smith I value competence and taste extremely highly in a partner; it shows a lack of both to make something bad and believe it to be good, particularly in a domain you claim to be passionate about https://t.co/P5hMa6Thrt Aug 19	5	0	0	0	—	800
@thereisnome369 I'm afraid I can't, it must be felt. one of the options should speak to you Aug 18	3	0	1	0	—	800
@WilliamBlickos lmao I'm glad, took me literally an hour of sifting through my giant "good words" list. and reading it back I wish I didn't do so many <adjective> <noun> formulations! shoulda mixed it up more Aug 17	3	0	1	0	—	800
@goblinodds ah yes, a kidnapping era. like Picasso's blue period. but for kidnapping wild about your great uncle's wife! I wonder what the rates of it were like. I mean, presumably pretty bad, but bad compared to a normal baseline or bad like kids were disappearing left and right Aug 15	1	0	2	0	—	800
@soundrotator @dreamyweather ooooh you ain't kiddin Aug 15	3	0	1	0	—	800
This strikes me as rather cowardly Aug 14	3	0	1	0	—	800
@RangerWrestl1ng nothing, unless they want a stern talking-to that begins with the ominous invocation of their middle names Aug 14	3	0	1	0	—	800
my sister sent this to me like 5 hours ago and we're already calling all possible aches, pains, ailments, maladies, and interpersonal problems "the dynamite headache" Aug 12	5	0	0	0	—	800
@thereisnome369 @tiredpillbug @AmyJoBaxter 😏 Aug 11	3	0	1	0	—	800
@Mechanical_Dodo https://t.co/LSOUJolnUm Aug 10	3	0	1	0	—	800
@TaylorMacP @WickedAIyoutube yeah, but I think it's more like the distinction between trusting bulletproof glass to stop a .22 and then firing at it with a tank shell Gandalf wielding Glamdring is technically in the category "a guy with a sword", but it's not exactly the median example Aug 7	1	0	2	0	—	800
@Konsenious @BearAirport I wonder if it changes after he returns as Gandalf the White. He's still trying to reason with Saruman at the end, so he has some reason to be if not friendly, at least not actively hostile Aug 7	3	0	1	0	—	800
@wit_gambeson haha like button go brrr Aug 28	2	0	1	0	—	700
@jackkrone_ Yeah, something they've claimed to have stopped. At the moment I think it's a lie I believe there is some platonic ideal of what this place could and should be, but no recent steward has had that vision in mind when managing it Aug 28	2	0	1	0	—	700
@ArkuAmore huge news https://t.co/Xhj63NaLu1 Aug 27	2	0	1	0	—	700
@tnickbyrnes4 ah shoot you might be right. which is also crazy because usually im more of a middle distance guy Aug 24	2	0	1	0	—	700
@silverarm0r I get this. one of the most intensely displeasurable (but also kinda cool) experiences I've ever had came up a second time like 2 weeks later, so I asked my brother if he wanted to help, because what if he wanted an intensely displeasurable experience too? Aug 24	2	0	1	0	—	700
it requires me to learn a particular type of video editing, a niche version of the general skill that I will likely never use again Aug 18	4	0	0	0	—	700
for an egirl whose dms I would slide into* Aug 17	2	0	1	0	—	700
@Slippyzipp6388 https://t.co/dUGQUufz0e Aug 16	2	0	1	0	—	700
@musestoomuch many are saying https://t.co/2ggEXbk1jp Aug 16	4	0	0	0	—	700
@wit_gambeson I was really surprised by the weights they went with! Gaining a follower for a post is only worth 8 likes to the algorithm, less than a qt or reply! Seems so low to me, I think my actual stats show something like an average of 1000 likes to get 1 follower Aug 15	2	0	1	0	—	700
Is it just the permanence? There aren't many things you simply can't back out of to the same extent. Short of abandoning your child it's committing to years of an uncertain future that you may realize wasn't for you after all Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
I agree with them the least, but I think I might actually respect the reasoning of the "I hate kids" crowd the most. Sure, if you hate kids, I won't insist you try to raise one. Seems fair Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
So do most of the other common excuses around not having kids. The loss of freedom, the attention it demands, the sea change it imposes. So what? That's life; that's moving to a new city away from your old routines; that's a million things Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
@goblinodds @Mechanical_Dodo man, I still gotta make one of those masks like I said I would. a winter project maybe Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
@goblinodds @Mechanical_Dodo 🥳🥳🥳🥳 they still look so cool Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
@zencephalon @Malcolm_Ocean hour fifteen, tops Aug 14	2	0	1	0	—	700
When am I supposed to be able to see the eclipse? I've been staring at the sun for HOURS Aug 13	4	0	0	0	—	700
@verybigcardinal @sedatesnail 🥰 basically my ideal outcome for a joke https://t.co/Q9Bi5U2n5C Aug 12	2	0	1	0	—	700
@moldbugchaser @macharyofme beautiful Aug 11	4	0	0	0	—	700
@Supamalaman and the more infrequent they are, the more insane they can/must be Aug 11	2	0	1	0	—	700
@driftingwendigo @rgbqcd America's pastime, they call it https://t.co/d8uqJuH1rY Aug 10	2	0	1	0	—	700
@goblinodds I actually think I just cracked this, I can let you know for sure tomorrow. unfollowing that many will still be slow, but who to unfollow I've got a 30-minute solution for Aug 10	2	0	1	0	—	700
@thereisnome369 fear not, the emoji selection was tactical rather than sincere 😘 Aug 30	1	0	1	0	—	600
every pig in 27 AD worked for Murder, Incorporated Aug 27	3	0	0	0	—	600
@goblinodds !! that's a cool family record to have. how old was she at the time? Aug 22	1	0	1	0	—	600
@wit_gambeson Yesssss, most wise. Both of my grandfathers passed away before I was born, I would've loved to have recordings like that as I grew up hearing stories about them Aug 21	1	0	1	0	—	600
@LukRamsay who among us... Aug 19	1	0	1	0	—	600
@shinboson but only a little death Aug 18	3	0	0	0	—	600
@wit_gambeson Marshmallow experiment world champ, I presume? Aug 18	1	0	1	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 a coin flip between that and being killed by the very thing they're studying. or, in rare cases, both: https://t.co/gOwqGgx5Di Aug 18	1	0	1	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 joining a long and noble line of men killed by a mob that was unable to hear the truth Aug 18	1	0	1	0	—	600
@silverarm0r come over https://t.co/mJUfnbc6Ae Aug 18	1	0	1	0	—	600
@kramerposts 🦀🦀🦀 https://t.co/rfSzq00ERy Aug 18	3	0	0	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 But when the alternative to even that is nonexistence, well, I dunno. It depends. Aug 17	1	0	1	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 Even though of course I know that's not actually true and I know plenty of people who shouldn't have become parents for all the misery they wrought, intentionally or otherwise Aug 17	1	0	1	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 I want my own kids so badly, I am a little blind to not feeling that way. I understand it intellectually, but some part of me just feels like... "but once you meet your own kids you'd feel differently" Aug 17	1	0	1	0	—	600
@thereisnome369 Ah, see, at weddings and the like I tend to meet the parents for 5 minutes to establish that I'm not crazy and then I'll start chasing their kids while pretending to be a dragon, or give them piggy back rides, or draw pictures with them where we each add something back and forth Aug 17	1	0	1	0	—	600
@DoofDoofson I am not! any recommendations? Aug 16	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds yeah, ~4 a year is bad within a relatively small community, but it's not the runaway crime spree I was expecting Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds reread this and realized I said kids like they were the only ones who were getting napped, but you know what I mean Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds ooh, I could get behind most of this. my limited interaction with the legal system certainly makes me think vendettas would often be more straightforward and just Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds I must learn more about this great and noble virtue of my forebears https://t.co/LV17WL7I2V Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds ohh lmao ok, I was literally about to hit send on "holy shit, they HATED us" Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@wit_gambeson They're so good! I always like seeing them on my tl Aug 15	1	0	1	0	—	600
@kenthecowboy_ In general that could be a possibility, in this instance it's not. They've been adamant about it for as long as I've known them, since before they would've even been thinking about trying Aug 14	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds shocked no one else has asked this yet: what are the other stereotypes??? Aug 14	1	0	1	0	—	600
@noa_tate_ :O impressive. one day soon I intend to pivot and do similarly, but for this month at least I believe it would conflict with my ongoing virality science experiments Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@noa_tate_ unless this is advertising some kind of suction cup martini glass, in which case I rescind my snark and merely respect the hubris Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@noa_tate_ ah yes, that classic dream scenario of staying perfectly still unless actively drinking your martini Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@noa_tate_ i still think about him https://t.co/OclNfBOQaF Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@noa_tate_ inspiring 1st 2k tweets: 3 years but once upon a time.... I was this close https://t.co/hvZlxv5C4m Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@sedatesnail @verybigcardinal oh, uh... if you haven't seen The Great Dictator, it's possible that this is going to warp your perception of one of the greatest movie speeches of all time, maybe just watch it all the way through first Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@sedatesnail @verybigcardinal you're not gonna like it, but it's meant to be someone getting horny for the wrong reasons while Charlie Chaplin implores "wwii soldiers" for humanity if I could take it all back... I wouldn't. but I would add "Unnatural Men! 🤨" and more of the speech https://t.co/lEkNroJRxB Aug 13	1	0	1	0	—	600
@UntilTrees is this how you discovered it too? https://t.co/xI1eHwjt24 Aug 11	1	0	1	0	—	600
@bridgietherease whoa, not even halfway through this, but: unreal Aug 11	1	0	1	0	—	600
@racheleaurouge I don't think I knew you had a substack! Most enjoyable, I'll have to read my way through the archive Aug 11	1	0	1	0	—	600
@AugustineFacts Not much at all, but you're right, it's a curve along which it gets more annoying to work, and then a point at which I won't even sit down. I could probably chart it against visible desktop surface area and get a pretty accurate result Aug 10	1	0	1	0	—	600
@AugustineFacts Keeping my desk clear. If I let the clutter build up, I lose a few days of work. Keep it completely empty and it'll be where I spend the bulk of my time Aug 10	1	0	1	0	—	600
@goblinodds succeeded in 9 days this time with 3 simultaneous viral tweets (my 13th, 14th, and 16th top-level tweets from the cull). biggest is currently at 117k Aug 8	1	0	1	0	—	600
@__drewface requesting a transfer to your bracket Aug 8	1	0	1	0	—	600
@hyperdiscogirl how did you call this at 8 likes. do you have the shinigami eyes but for tweets Aug 7	1	0	1	0	—	600
@pav_light are you... numbering your special interests in hexadecimal? because there are so many of them? Aug 6	1	0	1	0	—	600
@wit_gambeson Ooqui is this for understanding human color vision (as well as some other quirks); he's one of the most interesting channels on the entire site. He just released a 40-minute video about why functional human tetrachromacy is not as great as it's cracked up to be Aug 1	1	0	1	0	—	600
@MunicipleOrrery ah, good point. I don't appear to be wired that way so I didn't even consider it. too WASPy Aug 31	2	0	0	0	—	500
@thereisnome369 Without a doubt, the very same Aug 31	2	0	0	0	—	500
@bridgietherease oh absolutely. just last week I learned that "vittles" and "victuals" are in fact not different words Aug 29	2	0	0	0	—	500
@amazingflyingem excellent choice Aug 28	2	0	0	0	—	500
@jackkrone_ You may be right, but willingly making your core product worse to pressure people into paying feels like an unnecessary own-goal. Feels more like a key part of twitter's platform identity just doesn't work anymore Aug 27	0	0	1	0	—	500
@racheleaurouge Urologist, I hope Aug 27	0	0	1	0	—	500
@RandomSprint that was a prophetic dream. that's going to happen Aug 27	2	0	0	0	—	500
GF: (crying) BF: (still in gym clothes) babe, what's wrong? TWINK CORONER: this fuckin' job never gets any easier Aug 27	2	0	0	0	—	500
@babieswithb this has gotta be one of the weirder things I've been jealous of Aug 26	2	0	0	0	—	500
@harima_ronin_61 It's not thoughtcrime when he does it, because all of his thoughts are the good thoughts, and all of his opinions are the right ones. Really lucky how he happened to come to every correct conclusion 100% of the time Aug 23	0	0	1	0	—	500
@buydefault_ You are; I've definitely seen that kind of pro-and-con list thinking. But that's what I don't get about this couple in particular, they're not really doing that! They don't raise those concerns, they just seem to think it would go poorly without a firm idea of how or why Aug 17	0	0	1	0	—	500
@BabyCinephile97 I appreciate that you double-checked before jumping to conclusions Aug 16	0	0	1	0	—	500
@strangestloop @desertgodhead @aaaronwill @venividinotavi @janitachalam @rendroid1 @JackKrone @mradul_swapnil I'm enjoying it a lot, it's the main reason I started posting more. I wish I could see "days won" rather than just net points though; despite my point total, I think I've only won 4 or 5 days Favorite war movie is probably AQotWF (1930), Paisan, or Paths of Glory Aug 16	2	0	0	0	—	500
@munoz_ulyses hope you're eating it standing up Aug 13	2	0	0	0	—	500
@noa_tate_ plus I just like hoarding tweets until I can make them close enough to perfect (give or take whichever final edit I notice only after hitting send). I'm getting better at replying from the hip at least https://t.co/QzBy6dj914 Aug 13	2	0	0	0	—	500
@meaning_enjoyer real. I take a similarly effective approach https://t.co/PBt8C0yTY2 Aug 13	2	0	0	0	—	500
@willx6923 @St_Rev so what I'm learning is maybe I don't want the dynamite headache Aug 13	2	0	0	0	—	500
@EigenBraid I'll count it is a win if they start arguing about that instead Aug 11	2	0	0	0	—	500
@jicapal underappreciated banger Aug 11	2	0	0	0	—	500
@artbypep After a lifetime of eating croissants, I recently discovered that the best ones I've ever had are like 8 blocks from me If they're better in France I truly can't fathom how Aug 11	2	0	0	0	—	500
@spacefeudalist @LeeNguaccia ok fair, but counterpoint: I would absolutely watch the Balrog request a visa Aug 7	2	0	0	0	—	500
@specfictions extremely relatable https://t.co/ErbtzM1rHJ Aug 6	2	0	0	0	—	500
@bridgietherease Huh, I know what you mean, but I'm not sure if it applies to him or not. I don't think I've ever prodded him on his beliefs from that angle before, I'll give it a try the next time something comes up; maybe point to a higher authority in his belief system who disagrees with him Aug 31	1	0	0	0	—	400
@thereisnome369 a German lesson and a compliment from a someone with cool shades and a smirk? oh my, danke 😊 Aug 30	1	0	0	0	—	400
@mrscaew @chrishardman In short: remove bot followers. They cost views but don't like, so the algo sees your tweets getting low interaction rates and stops showing them to more (real) people. Slow to fix at 18k though Currently drafting the comprehensive fix, but until then: https://t.co/cFmbpzPyyX Aug 30	1	0	0	0	—	400
@thereisnome369 damn, I'll never know who my real friends and fake friends are ever again Aug 28	1	0	0	0	—	400
@amazingflyingem Cassette! Hell yeah Aug 28	1	0	0	0	—	400
@sir_lemmings @ArkuAmore Please do! I look forward to hearing the results Aug 27	1	0	0	0	—	400
@silverarm0r they could at least pretend like they had to think about it Aug 24	1	0	0	0	—	400
@kramerposts Haven't reread this in 20 years, but I am 100% positive it holds up Aug 23	1	0	0	0	—	400
@tidepoolsoup it was so good. I've been considering digging out my ps2 and seeing if it holds up, but I'm worried I've overhyped it in my memory Aug 20	1	0	0	0	—	400
@asierpovs then it'd be completely worth it and I'd start immediately Aug 19	1	0	0	0	—	400
@LeProjetSerret truly the movie where the concept of onscreen chemistry was born Aug 18	1	0	0	0	—	400
@unirespecter my man https://t.co/FZ32XDz6tD Aug 18	1	0	0	0	—	400
@thereisnome369 hmmm, this is most tempting. I'll keep you updated Aug 18	1	0	0	0	—	400
@sedatesnail incredible Aug 18	1	0	0	0	—	400
@MysteryHacker1 very cool. looks like site is down and wayback is having an outage at the moment, but once it's back online I'll be traversing through it Aug 17	1	0	0	0	—	400
@thereisnome369 it was YOU—! Aug 17	1	0	0	0	—	400
@DoofDoofson 🫡 added to my list, thanks Aug 16	1	0	0	0	—	400
@Leila41066094 @ianhowlett extremely true Aug 16	1	0	0	0	—	400
@goblinodds 😭 Aug 15	1	0	0	0	—	400
@kenthecowboy_ Late 30s, known them since they were ~19/21 and first dating Aug 15	1	0	0	0	—	400
@St_Rev fascinating. let's hope a monkey's paw didn't curl when I indirectly asked for this Aug 13	1	0	0	0	—	400
@thereisnome369 gdi, I knew it. bring me the dynamite Aug 12	1	0	0	0	—	400
@bridgietherease I've saved the album for future listening, please let me know if there's something in particular by him that I shouldn't miss! Aug 11	1	0	0	0	—	400
@ReposeGuru This is true Aug 11	1	0	0	0	—	400
@funplings Not a collection of articles, but I know of two books that have you shuffle the pages before you start reading. Might give them a similar "piecing-it-together" quality? The Unfortunates by B. S. Johnson Composition No. 1 by Marc Saporta (I haven't read either due to cost) Aug 11	1	0	0	0	—	400
@TechCapo only reason I'm in the game tbh Aug 11	1	0	0	0	—	400
@0bNARA an ancient and storied tradition https://t.co/vayVZZaB3K Aug 11	1	0	0	0	—	400
@FoopDooperino Not sure I could pick a favorite, but I love John Ruskin's Study of a Kingfisher https://t.co/78Q3xMYuKY Aug 10	1	0	0	0	—	400
@AugustineFacts And now that you mention it, my basic setup already takes up a lot of the available space, that's gotta be a decent chunk of the problem right there ...I should get a much larger desk Aug 10	1	0	0	0	—	400
@kenthecowboy_ the stuff dreams are made of (nightmares count) Aug 10	1	0	0	0	—	400
@jipingchiu @ascetic_shadow Oh man, that's actually a genius idea. I'll try to make it happen 🫡 Aug 9	1	0	0	0	—	400
@AnthonyCastrio Entirely by hand, I automated it once but it wasn't worth it at my follower count. Only takes a few minutes when you're removing ~100 or so against a predetermined list Aug 8	1	0	0	0	—	400
@__drewface here's hoping the competitive aspect of tpot wars is what finally teaches me how to post consistently enough to get there Aug 8	1	0	0	0	—	400
@werner58_ what a delightful niche fact. if it was only Scrooge McDuck I would've assumed it was just meant as a joke about his age, like Mr. Burns answering the phone with ahoy-hoy Aug 7	1	0	0	0	—	400
@Mechanical_Dodo ahhh, good to know, thanks. I'll try that in a week or two after what I imagine must be a fresh wave of follow requests dies down Aug 5	1	0	0	0	—	400
see what other fun facts you can learn at https://t.co/CT0kYolQfD Aug 1	1	0	0	0	—	400
@Paul_Melman haha I mean, I keep hanging out with him, so it's not like these are his only personality traits. I should post something nice about him to counteract all this bad press Aug 31	0	0	0	0	—	300
nobody like this. i'm better than this. (i'm not) Aug 28	0	0	0	0	—	300
you don't get to call yourself a <noun> if you don't <verb> artists draw writers write athletes train musicians play friends make time lovers [redacted] [redacted] [holy shit REDACTED] Aug 25	0	0	0	0	—	300
tag yourself Aug 18	0	0	0	0	—	300
@buydefault_ Like, I have heard them say that of course they'd figure out the finances and scheduling and working around their kids' lives, that wouldn't be the problem. Just some vague other reason that I'm not sure they've ever pinned down Aug 17	0	0	0	0	—	300
@Slippyzipp6388 ☝️ Understand. (by Ted Chiang) Aug 16	0	0	0	0	—	300
@lu_sichu sounds like something I would do. filing it away under "future projects" Aug 16	0	0	0	0	—	300
@lisatomic5 what a beautiful whistling tone also I kept looking at the fret hand, thinking "that looks like more than two fingers though??" Aug 11	0	0	0	0	—	300
@FoopDooperino oh wow, incredible Aug 10	0	0	0	0	—	300
@pav_light forgive me, we definitely don't know each other well enough for me to say this unprompted, but: hot Aug 6	0	0	0	0	—	300
I know that's not the type of quote that would need commas and I don't care Aug 1	0	0	0	0	—	300
Total · 266 tweets in September 2026	290,040	10,325	918	599	1 boosted	32,546,700

Posts, replies, and quote tweets count — native retweets are excluded. Mentioning a project on the boost list doubles that tweet's points.